I have just finished with a dad of 3, 18 and 17 and 12 after nine months. Their divorce came through recently. Im not feeling sorry for myself and I never broke the family. His Wife had affairs. I just cant win. Shes loaded now and gloating and playing with their emotions. Hes about to go bankrupt and the kids chose to live with him. I cant bear to see him in this terrible financial state. I got on fine with his children and never interfered. I finally asked him today to see a solicitor for an hour and I would pay. He refused point blank and said hed given in a long time ago and she will be allowed to continued disowning her kids at will. I had to finish with him as no future. Why do these men support their exes behaviour yet wont tolerate advice from new partners.? I have no kids but that is not a reason for me not to understand. I consider myself an intelligent human being but i dont get it?


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    My ex wants to move 1000km’s away and wants to take our son. He’s in the process of taking me to court to have this granted. He is accusing me of being a bad mother, being an alcoholic etc, and getting an ex friend of mine that I used to live with to stand behind him. Admittedly I was only 17 when I had my son and found it hard to bring him up by myself when he left but I have never consumed alcohol in front of my son nor has alcohol affected my life (ie, I’ve held down a stable job for the past 4 years). My life was a bit unstable, (not alcohol related, just a young mum trying to support her son alone) but over the past 18 months I have picked myself up and now rent a nice 2 bedroom unit with my partner, we earn a good income combined and have never been in trouble with the law, taken drugs or anything of that manner. I am so scared of losing my son I don’t know what to do. I have spoken to solicitors but I don’t know if I can trust them with the advice they’re giving me. I so far understand have the following in my favour: 1) My son was born here and all of his friends and family are here. 2) My ex seems to think he can go get a job at maccas and that will be enough to get a home loan. 3) I’ve taken my son off him before for dealing drugs. Does anyone know what he would have to do to succeed in taking him off me? Does anyone know if the court will take into consideration him slandering me? What should my solicitor be doing? I have a lot of friends who could write a lot of negative things about him, is it necessary? In my defence if I was such a bad mum my ex would have taken him off me a long time ago. I love my son more than anything and if he is allowed to go it will break my heart. Any advice would be fantastic. Thanks
    thanks so much I feel better already. I might add, I can’t prove the drugs.. I found out about them and then took my son off him and went to mediation but the papers I have from then don’t seem to mention it :( After he promised not to sell anymore I gave in to him and let him see him for 50% of the week.. its been like that for the past 18 months or so


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      I am a writer. This is research for a novel. I used to work in a legal office but that was a long time ago. Just checking whether anything has changed radically since computers entered the workforce?

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      Lawyers and solicitors fees, so many of them are charging huge fees are we powerless to stop this? Common arguments are they trained a long time, you can take them to court.
      They claim to be bound by ethics.
      But who created those ethics and law systems?
      What are your comments?
      I should like to hear from honest people who believe in justice but not at any price!

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