My mother in law passed away in April this year and my father in law is terminally ill and will also pass away any time – probably a few months at best. My husband is an only child.
Because of how things are, my husband’s inheritance from the sale of his parents house etc., will be finalised this week. It will be between 0,000 & 0,000 (depending on how much the solicitor takes out for his fees etc.)
So my mother in law had said when I fell pregnant with my daughter (her first grandchild) that she was going to write into her will that she wanted ,000 set aside for my daughter as an inheritance. This was in 2005.
I was 10 weeks pregnant when she died and I presume she would have wanted the same for her 2nd grandchild also, so we will be setting up 2 trust accounts for each of her bio-logical grandchildren to receive when they are aged 21.
The question is though, is that I have 4 children from my first marriage, whom she treated as her own grandchildren and even made reference to them as her grandchildren in her last letter to us (she committed suicide).
We own our house outright already and have a successful business and no debts so the money is not really needed and we will probably invest it, so I was thinking that perhaps it would be nice to give the 4 other kids a smaller portion for their future.
We do not speak to my mother and their grandmother from my 1st husband only sees them a few times a year – so it was the only nana they knew and were heartbroken when she died.
Do you think it would be appropriate to give the other 4 kids say ,000 as well for when they are older from their nana?
I did ask my father in law what he wanted as really it is his money still, but he is too ill to understand us and did not answer.
I am worried that if I do give them money, at a lesser amount, they may be resentful that the 2 biological grandchildren got so much more, but they would be hurt to not be included as well.
And if we do this, should we tell them it’s what nana wanted so they feel like they were remembered?
My mother in law said back in 2005 that she wanted to do this to make it fair, as the 4 kids from my 1st husband would inherit from that side of the family so this way it would end up fair on all the kids, but my ex-husband does not even pay child support so the 4 kids wont get a cent anyway. She wanted it so it would be fair, not because she loved them any different.
Or should we give them all ,000 for their future and invest the other 0,000 (for our retirement).
It was actually my husband’s idea to give them all something. He treats them all as his own and just wants everyone to be happy and secure.
And my mother in law never actually wrote anything about it into her will, but because we know it’s what she wanted we are doing it.
My father in law has signed it all over to my husband now, so the payment is coming to my husband this week. We will be getting it before my FIL passes away.