My partner has 2 childern before we met and we now have a oe year old boy and aonther baby on the way so life is great except for his x!
She also has a new partner and a new baby but is stll bein difficult regarding the kids and this has been goin on for over 2 yrs
We have been thru solicitors and came to an agreement but recently my partner had to take on a new job about an hour away so the agreement doesnt work anymore and she won be lenient.
All we want is to have the boys every second weekend from friday 4pm until sunday 4pm but because my partner wont be home until 630 she will not drop them off to me and wont let him have them as 630 is apparently too late for thm to come to sleep which we know is a lie and they are always with her mother.
What do you think the odds are that if we went to court that they would order for them to be dropped off to me until he gets home or with my partners mother (their grandmother) because we really miss them and feel like we need to fight so see them more.
I am a part of their life an they love me and tell me all the time but say dont tell mummy she will get angry and shes says i dont they are only 3 and 4 yrs old
PLS help i need advice on what we should do!!!
Thankyou…
sorry mr warrior i should have been more clear with the original agreement she made up is states them to be dropped off to us and for us to take them back so what u said is absurd and i find rude as we live 5 mins apart and its not like ur thinking AT ALL!! I love those boys like they are my own and would do ANYTHING for them i am not the problem trust me shes a very slefish person and she has been psychologically abusing them u should hear the things that used to come out of their mouths before they came to know me and now they do they love me very much but thats not the important matter here all i want to know is if when the boys are appointed to spend time with us will the courts allow me to be responsible for them and look after them until my partner gets home or will we only get them while he is here?
Are you thinking about selling your home yourself? then
This depends on the laws made out by the family courts in your province/ state. Everyone does things differently..
If you’re a legal gaurdian, then the children can be released to you. I suggest you and your partner head down to the court house to get this order of yours ammended immediately to include you regardless, as you are a partner and she has no right to refuse the children to you unless lawfully instructed to do so. I had this same plight with my fiance and my daughter’s bio-father and the courts DEEPLY frown apon the ex making rude comments to the children about the new stepp parent and they feel no sympathy for the bio-aernt. They say " hey, that’s your ex’s new partner, they are around your children, doing a great job, get used to it" and that’s that. The order sounds likek it would be in your favor VERY quickly
sorry about the spelling, broken wrist
I think the judge would change it as their dad is requesting.
You sound proud that the kids love you, but don’t cause problems because of it. Stay out of it and let their parents work it out.
How the kids feel about you is irrelevent.
Its not a delivery service! Pick the kids up yourself, your seeing this more as a burden than a gift to have these children.
Pick them up yourself OR find another time when u can pick them up at a suitable time. I see the problem with you rather than the ex.
Its not a pizza , kids do not get delivered.
The ex clearly has the kids most of the time which means if u ant them u pick them up. This is ONCE every two weeks . So it is two car trips every two weeks and you can not even do that. One to get there and pick them up and one to drop them off.
arrange a suitable time for YOU to pick them up. The ex has the kids most of the time and is primary carer which means you pick them up. All the ex has to do is make them available to you not offer a delivery service. If i was in the EX’s shoes i would be charging you petrol.
In response to your additional statement, no u were not clear and u did not state that the court required her to drop them off. I did not know that because u failed to show all the information. It changes the whole aspect of the situation now.
The Ex is in breach of the custody arrangments. You are in the right. She still needs to drop them off then even if your partner is not there. The ex knows who you are and knows the kids are safe with you.
Pls forgive me but you must understand i had every right to respond in that way considering you left out that crucial bit of information. I did not mean to question your devotion to the kids it was just the way the question was typed and missing crucial information like court decisions being left out.
It needs to be explained to the ex she is using her own agenda with your hubby against the children. The children need to see their dad and you and she is going against the health and well being of the child siding with her own reasons rather than that of the children.
This could easily be settled out of court with logical and calm discussion. The ex needs to understand that even her curcumstances can change in future so both mutual parties need to be more accepting of the other side and put aside agendas against each other.
actually been a mum myself i can see where that woman is coming from, 1st. its their fathers responsibility to be minding the kids not yours, regardless if claim you love them and they love you. he is the dad and he is the 1getting the access agreement, not you. your just somebody at the side.
2nd. been 3 and 4, is very young age they need plenty rest and sleep, when my child was that age, the bed time was 7pm, before bed was wash and time out ie. story time, so 6.30pm is cutting into that and ruining their routine = more unsettled.
she isn’t been the problem she is actually thinking of her sons, she thinking why should you be the 1 to be there when she drops the boys off as its not your boys they are his and his responsibility, nobody Else’s, the whole access is for him to spend that time with the boys, not to be off working.
my ex started new job while ago and when mentioned he be working and asked if his gf could mind my child, my answer too was NO. if anything happened to my child in her care, i would not only be kicking his @ss but hers even more and i end up behind bars. in the end he had take every 2nd wk-end off for the access or he got none, which he did take the time off.
i have no problems with the gf been there but so does my child father got be there, after all he is the dad and shall act as a dad and if not then tough, my child will remain with me where know be properly taking care of!! access is what it is, access and spending time with the child not leaving the child in somebody Else’s care.
you either ask for pick up time to be sat morning 10am-ish till sunday around 4ish or don’t bother. a judge will side with the mother after all she will express her wishes and and of course the child’s need and best interest be took into account, esp if ruining the routine and the father not going be in the house so why give access to the gf when those kids are not yours?? the father is the 1 with access not you so he has to be there, simple as. got except that and butt out it really!!!